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.And the guy did share his booze.Jim felt the turbulence stop as the shuttlecraft leveled out, and he glanced out the viewport.The sky was dark above and a vivid blue along the horizon.They were in the upper atmosphere.Below, the surface of the earth was slowly crawling across the bottom of the viewport.Jim watched as green fields gave way to tan plains, and then the Rocky Mountains jumped up and split the land, separating both the continent and Jim's old life from his new.Dark swaths of trees over brown mountains ran together with white salt flats and red smudges of iron ore eroding down ancient mountainsides, like the land was bleeding out beneath him.From here, the earth was a kaleidoscope of color and texture, spinning serenely in space like every other planet – a mystery and an adventure waiting to happen.No stale old farmhouse, no familiar faces, no man pretending to be his father…This was definitely better.It had taken some hard convincing from Captain Pike for Jim to even consider the idea.He'd spent hours riding around in the chill night air, unable to weigh the nauseating dead-end of his life against the unknown of Starfleet and space.The black had swallowed his father, had kidnapped his mother, and seemed to be a waiting disaster if he let himself be rational about it.For that, maybe this crazy Doctor McCoy was right.However, there was nothing better to be had on Earth, either.Still, he hadn't decided for certain until he finally steered his bike to the shipyards.The glow of the shipyard lights was just starting to fade into the pre-dawn light when he'd arrived, but the ship was there, like a sentinel on the horizon, or a Siren luring him in.It was then, Jim had to admit, that he'd accepted the idea of joining Starfleet.If something that beautiful was there waiting for him, it had to be better than the stale cycle of beer, sex, and dead-end jobs he'd been living.Starfleet.As soon as he'd made his decision, it was like the whole thing had just gotten into his blood.His mind had raced with the possibilities.New planets, new stars, new adventures.Aliens, danger, challenges, mysteries – space didn't have to be the horrible thing that had torn his family apart.The more his mind churned, the more it was obvious that this was everything he wanted.Now, with Iowa retreating behind the shuttlecraft and his future in Starfleet coming towards him on the horizon, he wasn't just walking away from his old life; he was racing towards a new one.It might be the same Earth spinning below as the one where he'd awoken two days ago, pulled on a pair of jeans, and thought he'd fall asleep that night as the same miserable waste of space he'd been the day before… but it sure felt different.It always looks so much better from up here, Jim thought."Really?"Jim felt himself jump in his seat, and snapped his head around.McCoy was regarding him intently, and Jim realized he'd spoken aloud.Swallowing his sudden unease at letting out any of his private thoughts, he nodded."Yeah, it does." He thought for a moment, then grinned and tilted his head towards the window."You gotta see this."Instantly, McCoy looked terrified again."No way, not interested –""Bones, take a look."McCoy flattened his lips stubbornly, and the veins on his temples looked ready to burst, but he finally leaned forward and looked out the viewport.Slowly, his eyes widened and the tight set of his mouth relaxed.Jim nodded, grinning, even though McCoy wasn't looking at him."You said she got the whole damn planet in the divorce, right? Well, look at it, Bones.There it is.You've got it.You're the one who's here to see it, so it's all yours.From here, she's a speck.She can't touch you from here.You're so far above her and the whole mess.They can't bother you, they can't trap you, they can't hurt you –""They?"Jim felt his stomach clench, shocked and disgusted at himself.The memories of Frank and every other one of his mother's stupid boyfriends came swimming back, something he'd spent too many years trying to forget.I've never let that slip… never said to anyone… damn, my head actually does hurt.Change in cabin pressure from the altitude, maybe… maybe they did hit me harder than I thought, he thought uneasily.Somewhere under that, other fears, nightmares hiding beneath the surface, stabbed sharply at the back of his mind, like something unreal that he'd never been able to explain, and was never able to quite ignore.Suddenly, the look of space outside the window of the cabin seemed too familiar, and he wondered, not for the first time, if it was possible for a human to remember things from the day they were born.He squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed the bridge of his nose, which was actually quite painful."Sorry," he mumbled."I've just known… you know… friends and shit who have been through… friends who haven't had it so easy…" His voice trailed off, and he was sure McCoy wasn't buying any of it.Shit, shit, shit… fuck.But if McCoy suspected anything else, he gave no indication.Simply nodded his head, shrank back into his seat, and closed his eyes.Knowing that it was better to simply shut up, wait out the shuttlecraft ride, and pretend he'd said nothing, Jim settled down into his own seat.Maybe he should just take off by himself as soon as they'd landed, and face Starfleet Academy the same way he'd faced everything else – on his own.Sure, his head felt fuzzy, and if he could admit it to himself, he was pretty sure he did have a concussion and that his nose needed to be set properly, but he'd had plenty of those before and had survived them just fine without any help.Yeah, that was what he'd do.It was better that way.Then McCoy cleared his throat."You're right."Jim glanced sideways without turning his head."Huh?"McCoy's eyes were still closed, but he was nodding slowly."It does look better from up here."With a shaky breath, Jim gazed back out the viewport.In the distance, he could already see the gleam of the Pacific ocean shining on the horizon under the early sunrise.He felt an unfamiliar sort of smile creep over his face.Unfamiliar… but strangely right.On second thought, maybe he would stick with McCoy.&.Pike finished the loop around the shipyard and leveled the shuttlecraft into a steady climb.The ground fell away beneath them, and soon, the deep indigo of the upper atmosphere filled the viewscreen as the world rolled by beneath them.Once past the turbulence of the lower mesosphere, Pike set the autopilot and turned to the internal shuttlecraft monitors.The cadets were all settled in nicely, chatting amongst themselves
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