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.His entire life experience had proven and reinforced, time and again, that no one went out of his or her way for him.He’d learned painful lessons to be suspicious of anyone’s motives if they did, or braced himself to have any offer negated, because nothing good lasts.He marveled over Michael having so fluidly and amiably accepted Andrew as a package deal.Not kids-in-the-way to be shunted aside, and never resented, simply accepted as part of what being with Andrew meant.Andrew’s natural, hard-won defenses were disarmed by it.He was motivated to allow whatever was happening between them to continue.He was further mollified by them maintaining important boundaries, neither of them pushing too far or too hard, but enjoying an affectionate closeness without getting closed in.He and the kids here in their own home, safe and secure, Michael a welcome visitor.They were welcomed in turn into Michael’s orbit.Connections and friends for Chloe and Tanner, the surprisingly gratifying common ground he and Michael’s father had quickly established discussing planting and parenting woes.It was a good place to be, Andrew decided, with a pleasant rhythm and more than a few benefits.It was a place he thought he could stay in for a long time, without bringing trouble or heartache to any of them.Andrew shivered when Michael’s hand slipped into his loose-fitting cutoffs and palmed his ass.He shut his eyes, then sucked in a sharp breath and twisted from their kiss.Michael made a short, impatient noise and pursued his retreat.“Hey, no.” Andrew kept evading Michael’s mouth.Michael grunted.“Light’s not even on—no one will see me ravishing you.”“Such a gentleman.” Andrew laughed.“But I don’t know, some of my neighbors might appreciate getting an eyeful of this action.”“And here you said you weren’t neighborly with anyone,” Michael teased.He started to nibble along Andrew’s jaw, but he added thoughtfully, “Just so long as no one would mind.”“I’m not—and I doubt it, but who knows.Who cares.People would probably be more shocked by me having company like a regular person might than by seeing us doing this.” Andrew was a neighbor in the same way he was out; he was private and tended to his own business, as with all things in his life.Until Michael, he’d had no reason to declare being out regardless, as there’d been no one but the kids in his life.But he’d made it clear to the Reeds who he was, because where the kids were concerned, being “discovered” and having that used against him trumped his desire for privacy.He’d always assumed that, from there, word had just gotten around, as happened in small towns.When he’d explained that to Michael after they’d started not-quite dating, Michael had laughed and said hiding had never been an option for him, considering his family knew and right there was a large portion of Starling’s population.“I feel like an old man saying this but, it’s late.”“But it’s summer.Not even a school night or anything,” Michael wheedled.Andrew straightened and said steadily, “Yeah, and those brats won’t get up any later than their usual o-dark-thirty just because it’s summer and I’m dragging.”Michael huffed but nodded, kissed him fast and light, then pulled back.He trailed his fingertips up Andrew’s sides then down Andrew’s arms, laced their hands together.“Come over for dinner tomorrow.We can have a sleepover.The kids can stay at the house and you can come stay with me.” Michael smiled, but the dim light revealed how widely he’d opened his eyes to gauge Andrew’s reaction and the licking of his lips was a nervous tell.They’d kept each other well satisfied in the intervening months, stealing quickies at his office or Michael’s loft between work and the kids.When that wasn’t feasible, they had long, almost tortuous necking sessions they couldn’t allow to inflame too far.Whenever they were together, Michael was in his space, touching him in some way.Andrew had experienced nearly no physical contact growing up, no one to cuddle or hug or soothe him; his relationship with Neil, in the end, hadn’t been much different.He’d learned that was normal, learned to avoid being touched, thought he didn’t enjoy it.With Michael his whole view upended.He’d discovered he more than enjoyed being sought out to touch and be touched.He craved it, thrived on it, wanted more.Andrew had a passing, fervent desire to drag Michael back inside, not just to the couch but to his bed, to wake up there with him and do this all over again tomorrow.Forget waiting, forget hiding behind the kids having somewhere else to stay.It would be another thing entirely from what they’d done to this point, an escalation on every front, and the idea of doing so scared and thrilled him.But he viciously compartmentalized and locked that thought away.Because he wanted to keep things working, and too many complications or inroads into their life chanced upsetting the good balance they’d found.The invitation and Michael’s desire tugged sharply, urgently, at the locks and his barriers.He tightened his hands involuntarily but was already shaking his head.“It’s cool,” Michael said quietly in immediate retreat.“You can still come for dinner, though?”“We’ll see.” Andrew smiled and disentangled a hand, patted Michael’s chest.The gesture should have been soft, intimate, but instead effectively set Michael apart from him.“I mean, probably, but I want to see how our day goes before I agree.”The locked-away part of Andrew was screaming and hammering at the boundaries, making him feel hollow, calling him a fool.The cold truth was that he wasn’t a fool, and he couldn’t get complacent about this.“I’ll call,” Andrew said into their silence, and the cicadas’ drone seemed to surge in volume.“Okay.” Michael shifted weight and stepped off the porch.His expression darkened, as if he was going to argue or at least needle Andrew about withdrawing, but that cleared and he accepted Andrew’s answer.“Thanks for dinner—it was a good night.”Andrew waved as Michael left.He stood and watched the taillights of Michael’s car as they turned a corner and disappeared behind a house, until the afterimage of dancing spots dissipated
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