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.My poor mother endured his rants with grace, and I believe now it was an act of mercy that God allowed her to pass from this earth when I was twelve years old.My sister, Justine, took her death hard and started standing up to Father.They went round and round until he kicked her out and told her he never wanted to see her again.She left home when she was seventeen and married Gordon Mackey.They lived in Kipling, but Justine would still visit her friends in Mayhaw once in a while.She was wild and daring, not always in a good way.“I was left to handle Father.The summer I was fifteen, I wanted to go with my friends to see the touring vaudeville act, but Father wouldn’t let me.As luck would have it, he was called to Shreveport on business, so I went anyway.Three nights in a row.The last night, my friends heard of a party at the Stardust, and I was afraid to go because Uncle Paddy might see me.But when Van Sweeney, the one I had my eye on, asked me to come, I did.“Some of the guys brought liquor.I’d never had a drink in my life, but that night I did.It felt so liberating.At first we were all just laughing and dancing, but then people started pairing off.I started feeling sick and went to the bathroom in one of the cottages.When I came out, Van was waiting for me.He’d been drinking, too, and…” Tears brimmed in her eyes.I leaned back, my own memory of O’Dell flashing like a marquee in my head.“You don’t have to explain that part.I know what you mean.”She smiled, the first since I’d come to her house.“I guess you do.And I now realize I pushed you into marrying O’Dell because you at least had a man who offered.Not that Father would have allowed me to marry Van.By the time I found out I was expecting, Van was long gone.I went to the Stardust to ask Paddy and Doreen for his address so I could write and tell him the news.They suspected something was wrong and had seen me that night even though I thought they hadn’t.They didn’t have his address but forced me to tell Father about the baby.”It didn’t sound like the Doreen and Paddy I knew, but they probably thought they were helping.“Is that why you didn’t like them?”“No, they ended up helping me.Father sent me to an unwed mother’s home in Tyler and made it clear I had to give you up.He told people I had a nervous breakdown.I wrote Paddy and Doreen and begged them to help me.They’re the ones who arranged for Justine and Gordon to take you.Paddy offered to pay them for their trouble.Justine took advantage of them and threatened to spill the beans if Paddy didn’t give them more money.Blackmail, really.“When Father died, they brought you to the funeral.Paddy told them he was through giving them money, so they left you with me.I was thrilled and gladly gave them their half of Father’s bank account with the promise they wouldn’t come back.Or tell.I knew I’d never find a husband if word got out that I’d had a baby out of wedlock.”I laughed, but it was harsh.“Guess that didn’t pan out so well, huh?”“I know.You reap what you sow, and I wanted to tell you the truth, but when you got older, I just couldn’t.”“That still doesn’t explain why you didn’t get along with Paddy and Doreen.You owed them a lot.”“I regret so many things.They’re one of them.They thought I should tell you the truth, but I’d already made up my mind.We argued, and I refused to see them.I was mortified when you started going out there.I was afraid they’d tell you.”“I guess that’s what Doreen meant by saying they’d given their word.”Alarm flashed in Aunt Cora’s eyes.“Doreen is here? She gave you the birth certificate?”“No.” I told her she’d written and how I’d found it in the wardrobe.“Funny.I was just trying to help Avril get the cypress knee Catfish carved for her.”“Who in heaven’s name is Catfish?”“Ludi’s son.He has the most amazing talent for carving.He told us the legend about cypress knees, how they connect the trees up and down the bayou.He compared them to people, that we’re all connected even when it doesn’t seem like we are.”“Uncle Paddy used to tell me that story.I’d forgotten.” Tears glistened in her eyes.A lull fell between us.It didn’t change the years of lies Aunt Cora told me.How could I ever get used to thinking of her as the woman who gave me birth, then lied for twenty-five years? The coil wrapped around my heart tightened.Aunt Cora placed her hands on her cheeks and rubbed them.“I don’t know what happens now.I guess it’s your call.I’m too old to care about my reputation, and with Van coming back, I’m in more of a tizzy than ever.”“I think he cares for you.And you must’ve told him about me.I guess that’s what you were shouting about.Why did you tell him when you wouldn’t even tell me?”“I didn’t tell him.He figured it out.He said you look just like his sister.He and Malcolm Overstreet started comparing notes, I think.Malcolm was at the Stardust that night.Not part of the vaudeville act, but he partied with us.What a mess.”“It’s a mess you created.I think you should untangle it.Maybe it’s time you told the truth for a change.”“I didn’t expect you to be so bitter.”“I guess that’s one thing you did teach me.” My mouth tasted sour—the same way it did every time O’Dell cheated on me again.I hated the dirty way I felt, raw inside.I gathered up my birth certificate, the photograph, and my purse.“One other thing.How did your mother die?”“I thought you knew.She had polio [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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