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.The only incident during dinner that does remain in my mind is Briony’s sudden query: ‘Didn’t we come here once with Mac?’The glass in Lance’s hand jerked violently and a red stain spread down the front of his jacket.I asked as naturally as I could, ‘Mac who? I don’t remember being here before.’Lance said nothing at all.After a moment Briony replied, ‘I must have dreamt it.It just suddenly seemed to ring a bell.’ We both looked at Lance but he didn’t meet our eyes.The pulse was beating insistently in his temple.Soon after that we went upstairs.I had intended to have a bath but was now so sleepy I decided to postpone it till the morning.I was already in bed and Lance was brushing his teeth in the bathroom when Briony, barefoot and in the nightdress I’d brought for her, came through to our room.I sat up.‘What is it, dear?’She said in a small voice, ‘Can I sleep in here, with you? I’m frightened of being alone, in case I – go away again.I can sleep on a chair or anything, just as long as I can stay.’Lance said firmly, ‘You’re certainly not sleeping in a chair, and nor is anyone else.If you want to stay here you can have my bed and I’ll use yours.’‘But I don’t want to turn you out – Daddy.’ Only I seemed to register the slight hesitation before his name.‘Nonsense.Now in you get and straight off to sleep.We’ve a busy day again tomorrow, travelling home.’ He looked across at me.‘Good-night, Ann.Sleep well.’ He closed the bathroom door behind him.Briony looked at me.‘Sorry, Mother.’‘It’s all right, darling.I’m happier keeping an eye on you, anyway.’ And Lance was obviously relieved to be away from both of us for a few hours.She bent down to kiss me and climbed into the adjacent bed.I reached up to switch off the light and blessed darkness at last brought an end to the chaotic, turbulent day.I woke the next morning to the unfamiliar sound of footsteps overhead and the muted hum of heavy traffic.Alongside me Briony still slept heavily.For a while I lay reviewing the still unsolved problems which surrounded us and eventually, when it was obvious sleep would not return, I went through for my postponed bath.Above the running water I thought I caught the sound of voices from behind the door leading to Lance’s room, and after my bath I tapped on it and went in.He was sitting up in bed reading The Scotsman, a cup of tea on the table beside him.‘I thought I heard sounds.How did you sleep?’‘So-so.’ He laid down the paper.‘Is Briony awake?’‘She wasn’t when I came through for my bath.’‘I’ve just been on to the police again, to see if they could tell us any more than she could.’‘And did they?’ I closed the door softly behind me.‘Not a great deal.Apparently she approached a policeman in the street early yesterday afternoon and told him she didn’t know where she was or how she’d got there.She was in what they called a “distressed condition”.He radioed for assistance and they came in a police car and took her back to the station.That was when they phoned you.’‘Was she near your flat?’ I asked with studied casualness.His face twitched slightly.‘Yes, just in the next road.The shop she described sounds like the one where we used to get some of our supplies.’‘It could only have been coincidence, though, couldn’t it?’‘Search me.Ann, what are we going to do about her?’ Anxiety was strident in his voice.‘There must be something seriously wrong.’‘I know.’ I sat on the edge of the bed.‘I can’t think why she came here when she was so against coming to Scotland.Could the art school have any particular significance for her?’If the idea had not been so ridiculous, I would have sworn that the expression which flickered in his eyes was sheer naked fear.‘How could it?’ His voice was almost unrecognisable.‘I don’t know, except that she seems to have become interested in painting herself, and since she thinks so much of you, she might subconsciously have decided to come here herself.’‘I suppose it’s just possible.The thing I find most unnerving is that she came all this way without knowing it.’‘Yes.’ I couldn’t elaborate on the half-formed thoughts which fluttered so distortedly in my mind.I said with an effort, ‘Possibly the severity of the headaches brought on some kind of amnesia and her subconscious just took over.To understand that, we’d have to consult a psychiatrist.’ I held my breath, and as I’d expected his reaction was swift.‘No, thank you! I’m not having any of those pseudo-psycho fellows messing about with her.Burton’s a sound man, he’ll know what to do.’‘He did mention psychoanalysis himself,’ I began diffidently.‘When?’‘The last time we saw him, after she’d passed out.He couldn’t find any orthodox medical reason for the attacks.All the tests and X-rays they did last month were negative.’‘I thought no one knew the causes of migraine?’‘I doubt if migraine as such could lead to actual amnesia.’‘It might.Anyway, she was due to see Burton again this week, wasn’t she? We’d better have him round as soon as we get her home.’The door from the bathroom opened behind me and Briony stood there rubbing her eyes.‘I thought you must have gone down for breakfast.’I stood up.‘Not without telling you, but now you’re awake we might as well all get dressed.’‘Briony –’ The note in Lance’s voice halted us and we turned back.‘Has anything like this ever happened before? To a lesser degree, of course, but – things happening without you being aware of them?’Remembering what Jan had said I waited anxiously, but her reply was vague and indecisive.‘I don’t think so, though sometimes things do seem rather blurred when I look back.I suppose everyone finds that.’We neither confirmed nor denied it.I suspected that few people ‘went away’ when out for the evening, meanwhile managing to bypass a very real allergy
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