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.I glide back into the bathroom with him on my heels and pull some toilet paper from the roll, pretending to wipe my face before I drop it in the garbage can to cover up the evidence.“Not until we talk about what happened last night.”I put my hands on the bathroom counter and pretend I don't feel his hard body looming over me, hands quivering, pants getting tighter by the second.It's hardly even possible for the two of us to coexist in the same small space without falling to it like rutting beasts.The corner of my lip twitches.Pregnant.The word is a whisper, caught on the sound of the rotating fan and getting lodged in my ear.“Amy, I was a shithead last night.I shouldn't have said what I said.O' course I'm glad I dragged your sweet, little ass out of that one-horse town.I saw some things that really fucked with my head yesterday, and I reacted.Badly.I'm just so fuckin' worried about you.”“I'm fine, Austin.I like it here.”“Yeah, but you got shot, Miss Cross.Shot.And this is not an isolated incident.We lost ten members of our group.What if you had been one of them?” I understand where Austin is coming from.What he needs to realize is that I don't care.I mean, I do care about the lives lost and the tragedy, but I don't care about the danger of it.If that's the price I have to pay to be with him, to live this life, then I'll take the risk.“Austin,” I begin, turning around and finding that my ass is pressed up tight against the counter.He's so close, I can feel his breath on my cheek when he leans in close and breathes in my scent.“I want to be with you.”“What if I'm not good enough, Amy?” he says, his voice dropping low.Austin's big, beautiful hands come up and brush gently against the sleeves on my robe.I think he's afraid to touch me.I put my hands on his chest and push him back a step.“I'm a shit President, and maybe I'm a shit … lover.Boyfriend.Whatever it is you want to call me.I ain't ever done anything like this before.” He smiles slightly.“When it comes to relationships, I'm almost as virginal as you were.”I grab the sides of his stubbled face, enjoying the rough texture against my smooth flesh.“You are not a shit President.Why can't you see in yourself what everybody else sees in you, Austin? You have a strong heart and a sound mind.That's all there is to it.” I let go of him and step back, watching his dark eyes follow me with desperation and hunger.“Now, apologize for last night, and we'll move on.” I try to make my voice sound chipper, but it comes out fractured and wanting.I just found out there's a very good chance I'm pregnant, and I'm already prepared to hop back in the sack? For shame, Miss Cross.For shame.I suppose it's too late to worry about such things.“I really am sorry for what I said, Amy.You needed me, and I acted like a donkey's dick.” I chuckle and slap a hand over my mouth as my heels bump into the garbage can with the pregnancy tests.I've moved back as far as I can go.My breath flutters in my throat like a sparrow, tiny wings beating against my insides, giving me that nervous stomachache again.“You're forgiven,” I say, watching him breathe a sigh of relief.Austin runs his fingers through his hair, the tattoos on his arms shining bright under the harsh fluorescent lighting from above.Austin must be quite handsome to be able to stand under these lights and not suffer for it.“But you're still not okay, are you?”“I'm a little stressed, sugar.I won't lie to you.” He turns and leans his back against the wall, examining me with restraint and desire both mixing in his dark gaze.“I don't want to fail, but it seems like that's all I'm doin' lately.Messin' up and tripping over my own damn feet.” I reach my fingers down to the tie on my robe.I debate briefly on whether I should tell him about the tests or not, but decide against it.Not when he's feeling this stressed out.I don't want the moment to be anxious, and how can I expect him to react positively when I'm still not sure how I feel about the whole thing?“It'll be okay,” I tell him, untying the robe and sliding it down my shoulders.I wince a bit when it moves over my bandage, but I keep my facial expression pleasant.Sex is to guys what a reading session in front of a fire is to chicks – chocolate and wine included.I thank Sali Bend for her advice and let the robe hit the floor in a pool of white terry cloth around me.“Give it another chance and you'll see.” The restraint in Austin's eyes breaks, and he strides across the room towards me, clutching my elbows with such gentle strength that it almost brings tears to my eyes.I kiss him hard and deep, pressing the line of my naked body against his.Even if he hasn't said it, I know he loves me.No one could kiss like that if they didn't feel that breaking, soul shattering ache inside.I pull away suddenly and grab his wrist, dragging him into the bedroom but past the bed.Austin's blonde brows climb towards his hairline as I pause in front of the sliding door to the balcony and slide it open.Hot summer heat creeps in, clashing with the cool air from the air conditioner.I smile at his puzzled look and glance out at the nearby balconies.There's nobody else around and even if there were, they can – excuse my French – go fuck themselves [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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